If being hard on yourself worked,it would have worked by now

If being hard on yourself worked,it would have worked by now

We often find ourselves being overly critical of our own actions. In fact, we tend to be even harsher on ourselves than we are on others. It’s interesting to think about why this happens. My theory is that we are taught to be compassionate and understanding towards others, but when it comes to extending that same kindness to ourselves, when we try to show the same compassion toward ourselves, people around us tell us that we are not trying hard enough, that we could do better, or worse yet, that we are simply lazy.
It’s quite unfair, don’t you think?
So we learn that only others deserve kindness and compassion.

Not to us.

Because we could have done better. Because WE could have made more efforts.

Another factor that could potentially influence our behavior is the significance we attach to ourselves in comparison to others. From a young age, we are taught the value of prioritizing the needs of others over our own, as being self-centered is often frowned upon. Consequently, we tend to place greater importance on the well-being of others than on our own. This tendency to prioritize others over ourselves also leads us to be more forgiving and lenient towards them while being more critical and demanding of ourselves.
We don’t allow ourselves to be wrong, but we understand the mistakes made by others. However, it’s crucial to recognize that you are just as important as anyone else. I understand that it may be difficult to believe this, as you have been conditioned since childhood to prioritize others and feel guilty for inconveniencing them. But let me tell you, these thoughts can be unlearned. Giving yourself the importance you deserve is the key to maintaining good mental health.

Giving ourselves importance enables us to establish boundaries, make autonomous decisions, and uphold self-respect. Because, let’s face it, if being overly critical of ourselves actually yielded positive results, we would have seen them by now.

Try another strategy.